You, Me, and a Rainy Knish - Happy Anniversary

       

So, it’s a regular weekday afternoon. I just got Tommy down for a nap, I spent a good ten
minutes looking for the magic bullet blender blades in the kitchen before giving up, threw
some random clothing pieces in the downstairs hamper, tossed the fart-noise truck and
costume parts in a basket in the front room, cleared a little more of the kitchen counter
and plopped down to skim social media for a mindless moment. (A wooden spatula and
cookie crumbs are still visible on the floor with who knows what else.)

Anyway, in my scrolling, I came across this old picture of us. You and I in New York, late
summer 2013, standing in the rain on a city street, sharing a knish. We were wandering
and enjoying the place at our leisure, taking and having time for whatever we felt like doing.
A knish in the rain? Why not? A walk through the NYC Library? OK! Some shopping at the
MOMA store? Of course! It was a less complicated time in our lives, and everything really
was about just you and I.

In all the hubbub of day to day life, the hustle out the door to work/ school/ babysitter in the
mornings,the rush of after school pickups, dinner makings, child bathings, appointment
keepings, bedtime doings, and collapsing on the couch for a moment to breathe before
getting ready for bed and starting again the next day, it’s easy to get caught up and lose
sight of moments like the one in this picture. The times when you and I are on carefree
adventures are few and far between these days, but I relish it when we have them.

Going off on a 'Moon Date' (Lunasia and Last Man in Pasadena), playing a silly game,
watching a show, sharing a snuggle before we both crash from exhaustion - all these
snippets, half moments, take me back to those early days when our us time was
unlimited and remind me that, in all of it, you and I have something pretty awesome.
I’m reminded in these moments that I not only love you (obviously), but I’m also a really
big fan of us. #wearesoawesomeweshouldwearcapes

And in all the craziness, when I stop to look around for a moment, I realize that I like this
time of chaos too. We’ve got some pretty great kids, and we’ve carved out a decent little
niche for ourselves here in California. It turns out that I’m a big fan of our little family, our
home in this place, and our life here. It's wort pausing long enough to look around and
appreciate it before the moment passes - we’re pretty lucky.

So before I rush off to do another of the many things undone, I’d like to take this moment
to say that I love you, Captain. Thanks for sharing a knish in the rain. Thanks for being a
fantastic father to our wild and fantastic children. Thanks for being here for me to hold onto,
my something solid when the world is in chaos. Thank you for being you, and for being mine.
To steal a line from Queen: Ooh you make me live/ I'm happy at home/ You're my best friend. (Listening to the full song is requisite.)

All my love,

Your Lady

… and just because it’s fun to look back, here are some pictures of us:

Honeymoon Babies - November 2012 - We were so young!



Awkward Pregnant Belly-Holding

& Less Awkward Tummy Hiding

Grandma James’ House

November 2013

Reese Party of Two + One!
Underbelly Restaurant (totally worth it)
& at Home Houston 2014

Reunited in Tucson

(after a month apart for the move to CA)

November 2015

↤ Grandma Debby’s House

November 2016

   

  Back to Where It All Began - Woodlands Waterway Park

         November 2017

Reese Party of Four - Houston - March 2018

Goodbye Grandma James

My grandmother passed away the 27th of September, 2018. She had suffered a stroke shortly after we last visited in Thanksgiving of 2017, but she was in relatively good health up until two weeks before her passing. She went on some painkillers to alleviate her complaint of leg pain, and my uncle found her barely responsive one day. The medicine is believed to have caused seizures, and she was sedated in the hospital. She only roused once during her stay at the hospital, while my cousin Becca was with her. She died in her sleep with family close at hand.

The silver lining to the situation was the family had cause to all come together. Such a gathering hadn't happened many years, where all but a couple of spouses and cousins on missions were able to attend Grandma's funeral. Due to a backlog at Ft Sam Houston, she wasn't buried until 12 October 2018.

Viewing was held at Porter-Loring North on 11 October 2018. Not a lot of attendance, but there was a very nice slideshow of pictures on presentation. At Grandma's request, the casket was closed.

Flying with a child between 1 and 2 years old is easy.

Waiting for bags at San Antonio

Koda and John meet. Krystal looks on as Eric does his kid act.

Chicken head at Target.

Chaos at Eric and Krystal's home

L to R: Aunt Tammy, her daughter Erin, her daughter Becca and husband Scott

Children of Aunt and Uncle KB and Kim, L to R: Kendelle, Corey, Erin. In front is Erin's daughter Charlotte

Immediate family of Frank and Valerie James, L to R: Felicia (my mom), Uncle KB, Great Aunt Patty, Aunt Tammy, and Uncle Kevin

Family of Patty Birkinshaw Wood, my great aunt, L to R: Chris Wood (Patty's son), Patty, Jenica (Chris's daughter), Julie (Chris's wife), Stacey (Patty's daughter)

 The services were held at Grandma's church building. We had a procession with police escort to the cemetery at Ft Sam Houston, which we barely made it into due to a last minute Whataburger run. We had an aggressive Dodge try and break into our procession and hopefully felt ashamed for throwing off our groove. And also, we lost track of the rental key with all the loadings and unloadings. Alison spotted it at last in the trunk--it fell in while getting out Tommy's stroller. We were only delayed 10ish minutes.

We arrived on a Wednesday, had the viewing on Thursday, and the services and interment on Friday. It doesn't sound like a lot on paper, but it was pretty tiring. I only managed this shot of the old James home in Windcrest late at night on Friday.

Apparently, unknown to me, Grandma had a preferred dining establishment in town, called Chester's. I had never been there. We always went to Fuddruckers. Nonetheless, we went to Chester's for lunch on Saturday, before we returned home to California.

A brief walk just before the rain hit

John Wayne and John Reese at the Santa Ana airport

Life moves on. We hope to see Grandma again when we pass on...hopefully not too soon.

We made an impromptu ice cream stop in Glendora Village on a hot summer afternoon.

John somehow fell asleep on a Sunday afternoon.

I became a videographer for a friend's 30th birthday party (sorry friends...I still need to do something with the video)!

The appearance of a box makes for hijinks.

I braved the Cal Poly Pomona Pumpkin-palooza. Alison was out with friends, so I went with Rob and Michelle and kids.

After returning home from San Antonio, we had high winds in the area. Trees and branches were downed all over, including power lines. We lost power around 11:30 AM and didn't get it back until after 7 PM. I had to go pick up John from preschool because they had no power, and of course I happened to be driving Alison's car, which didn't have a house key attached. No power = no access to the house, so I had to drive all the way to her school to take her house key to get in.

Grandma Debby was in town for one day, so we got to eat in the Buca di Beppo Pope Room in Pasadena. John did not like the Pope's eyes, so we had to be careful when passing around food on the lazy susan upon which the waxen pontiff sat.

We took the rare occasion to go out. Pasadena is a great place to visit as long as you don't have to drive there. Fortunately we have an excellent light rail right by our house. Downtown Pasadena is extremely walkable. We tried out this excellent dim sum house, Lunasia. I was very impressed, and any time you can eat out for two under $40 is a win. We saw First Man afterward, which is an excellent movie about Neil Armstrong, and don't let weird political criticism keep you away.

Hello, Life

Per the norm, it's been a while. Today I am home with a sick baby and a sinus infection myself, so it's been an opportunity to slow down, relax, and refuel a little in the hectic pace of every day life. I know it's odd that a sick day can be this, but often when you're on the mend but still not well enough to stand and deliver as an educator, a sick day can be a blessed reprieve in spite of masses of mucus causing headaches.

Some general observations about life in this new Fall 2018 season - Tommy is off the charts huge for his 13 months. He is walking, talking a fair amount in his own little ways: 'allo (hello) , 'I (hi), all dah (all done), uh-oh, gogo, OK, momma, d-dy (daddy), jaja (John John), up-a (up) & n-n-no! He stomps all over and is happiest when playing with John. He is all smiles and giggles, and has yet to meet a person he hasn't liked.

John seems to have adjusted pretty well to his new teacher and classmates at Foothill Christian Preschool. For a kid who went through a lot of hard transitions and drama at school when he was 2 and 3, his life seems almost strangely drama free. It's a nice change. He has lots of fun with his old friends on the playground (Dominick, Jackson, and Brandon still among those favorites), and he's made new little friends in his classroom this year, DJ and Logan. He also frequently talks about the guy who uses potty words and is not nice. We talk a lot about how he's still learning and we should be kind to him even if he makes different choices than we do. I feel like, hooray that he knows that's not how to act, and also, now let's teach him not to be a self-righteous jerk.

Gordon's had some excitement at work lately. In the summer he got to present the "dry run" of the Northrop Grumman pitch to NASA with clients and managers in the room. The guy whose job it is was out of town, and Gordon made the presentation last minute. One of the NG managers came up after and said he did such a good job, he should make the actual presentation as well. Gordon was not eager to jump into the Q&A fray with so little preparation, but it was cool that he got such high profile and positive exposure. 

He also had a customer presentation today and was all dressed up in his suit and tie on his way out the door. It seems like things are going in a positive direction for him there, and it's also been great not to have to deal with any launch testing schedules for most of this year. Having him around during regular at home hours and not having to work graveyards is great for everyone.

I've had some big changes at work as well. I got moved from a portable in the far back end of campus (technically outside the main gates) to a large room with lots of storage right off the quad. I have one less section of freshman and one more of sophomores, which is a step in the direction I'd ultimately like to go in, teaching more upper than underclassman sections of English. I also have a chrome book cart in my classroom this year which makes everything easier when it comes to incorporating digital assignments and grading. I am also the debate, fashion club, and unofficial GSA advisor. Coupled with being at the heart of campus and able to access the faculty workroom in a matter of 2 minutes rather than 8, my work situation has really improved significantly. Most notably, I have no student who seem unreachable. Even the challenging ones seem to want to do well, and I can work with that.

Gordon and I made some personal life goals before the summer ended to try and mitigate the chaos of life as we headed back into the two full time working parents mode. Even when we're not 100% successful, it feels good to have plans and work towards better together. In small ways, I feel like we're figuring this family of 4 thing out. Also, I can bear my testimony of Instant Pot. Pressure cooker dinners have literally changed our lives.

I also made a commitment to myself to try and be more human this school year. I read Cal Newport's Deep Work recently, and the take away for me was about work/home life balance and how to be more proficient and productive in both aspects of life. It's interesting, research based, and pretty profound, actually. I would put it up there with Gladwell's Blink in the degree to which it affected the way I think about the kinds of choices I make and why. Anyway, that plus making a point to actually spend time with friends and family in meaningful ways makes me feel less like I am lost in the work machine, and that allows me to go back without feeling quite so resentful of it. It's a win-win really.

Also, John has had snow tiger drama. He lost his favorite little sleep toy, "snow tiger," sometime in the summer. Since the Easter Bunny brought it to him, John asked if we could write Santa and he could talk to the Easter Bunny, then Santa could get his elves to make a new snow tiger like the first one so he could be happy again. His detailed depiction of how this would all play out was pretty impressive. Anyway, last week Friday when John came home from School he found a new snow tiger with a note from Santa explaining that he spoke to the Easter Bunny and had his elves make him a replacement Snow Tiger (not exactly the same, but close). Then after all that, the original snow tiger showed up in one of Tommy's clothing bins under all the folded laundry. So now there are two snow tigers! (Hopefully we can keep track of at least one at a time. Haha)

All is well here in Glendora, with the necessary exception of complaint that California weather is not yet perfectly autumnal. (I'm told by natives that complaining about the weather and traffic are SoCal cultural musts.) Two and a half years in, and this place has finally grown on me. If or when we leave, I will leave a piece of my heart in this place. I suppose that's all for this little slice of life update.

'Till next time,
Alison

Here are some photos for good measure: